The other day I was playing around on my phone and opened up the “voice memos” app.
I was pleased to find a specific recording and it reminded me of how praying helped my love life in a profound way.
When I was 25 years’ old and was in my last year of university I would go for a lot of walks. I would get tons of inspiration on these walks and I would often take out my phone and hit record. I was at a place in my life where I had a lot of visions that would spin around in my mind.
Little did I know that only God’s vision is what mattered.
At this time in my life I was single and I would often think (and dream) about exactly what kind of man I would like to marry..
I would reflect on every possible quality that I wanted in a man, and in a relationship. In a way it was like I was sending out a prayer to find my husband. I ended up hitting record and this is what came out:
“He must see me for who I really am, and fall in love with that. I must see him for who he really is, and fall in love with that. We are both great lovers and friends. He must compliment me in all the ways I am not strong. And I must compliment him in all the ways that he is not strong.
It must be real love, and that real love means that we do not feel the need to control each other. I want to be in a relationship where we allow each other to grow and become more than we ever thought possible. We do not constrict each other in any way. I am in a relationship where we are both on a level playing field in regards to how financially stable we are.
We must love discussing our ideas but we are both capable of following through with our ideas (we are “doers”). The physical attraction we have is equal.We both want to be good communicators. He is a very honest person, and so am I.
We both want to have a family. We aren’t afraid to laugh at ourselves when we make mistakes. I fall in love with reality. I am not the sole purpose of his life, but I am one of his priorities. He is not the sole purpose of my life, but he is one of my priorities.”
This was recorded on September 9th, 2019.
Around the time I made this recording I was having a conversation with my naturopathic doctor. (See How A Naturopathic Doctor Changed My Heart). We were on the topic of dating and relationships and she asked me – “what would you call this husband that you want?”
I responded – “out of all of the qualities I would like, the most important are that he is honest and hard working.” She responded, oh you mean a “salt of the earth” kind of man?
That one had a nice ring to it.
I went back to my phone to the same voice recording and renamed it – “Salt of the Earth Husband.”
She also asked me – “what does your husband look like?”
I really had no idea – I practically felt like I was just making something up. But I told her, “he is about an inch taller than me, has darker hair than me, olive-ish skin, blue gray-ish eyes and is built a bit thicker.”
She also emphasized just how important praying for your love life is.
After that meeting, I would put my headphones in before bed at night consistently for months and listen to the recording over and over again.
What I was doing was I was praying for this man. But I didn’t really have any idea how he would come into my life, or if it was even possible.
At some point in time I gradually stopped listening and completely forgot about the recording for a couple years.
As with most peoples’ love life. What followed was disappointing dating experiences. As well as a loss of any hope in that area of my life.
I felt as though all of my praying before was just dreaming, and I was destined to be on my own forever. I was forced to completely surrender everything to God.
Something that revealed itself to me after a particularly painful dating experience was that I needed to be a “salt of the earth” woman in order for God to really take me seriously. In the recording I made, I noticed I said “we” a lot.
I do believe God answered my prayers. But he only answered them when I genuinely accepted and surrendered that I am secure without my prayers answered.
The recording I made almost five years’ ago was either a sentiment of my unrealistic ideals for a potential husband or it was truly aligned with what God had planned for my life.
On April, 19th, 2022 – God put a man into my life who was about an inch taller than me, darker hair, olive-ish skin, blue gray-ish eyes, and built a bit thicker. He was honest, and hard-working.
Time revealed to me that he was in fact, the salt of the earth husband I was praying for.
Sometimes, God will answer prayers only when you have realized through life lessons the true meaning of your prayer.
This post was inspired by:
Heartland Family Wellness Centre
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