I didn’t realize finding and choosing a wedding dress would be as big of a decision making process as it was. I am usually very decisive about buying clothes and other material things – but this decision wasn’t easy.
The process of finding and choosing a partner, was also not a walk in the park, and I couldn’t help but relate both processes.
Here is why I believe finding the right wedding dress, was almost exactly the same as finding a suitable partner:
1) I already had a perfect idea of what I thought I wanted in a wedding dress – but that changed.
When you are an idealist like me this is something that can sometimes hinder us. Always, be open to being proved wrong about your ideas. Try on the dress that doesn’t necessarily catch your eye while hanging on the rack.
Date the guy who isn’t “your idea of a perfect man” – you might be surprised how you feel in it. (See 5 Tips On How to “Date” in the Age of Online Dating)
2) I didn’t want to feel uncomfortable, but I also didn’t want to settle for casual and “blah.”
You don’t want a hum drum dress that is “good enough”. You want to feel comfortable in it, but you also want to look in the mirror at it with… “wow, I love it.”
Same thing applies to your choosing a partner – he must feel like home – but also that feeling of “wow”. You won’t want to settle for anything less, as you might regret it later.
3) I wanted to go for something that suits me as best as possible now, and be open to having adjustments later
You find and choose the dress that suits the real you, but it’s not in the EXACT perfect size and fit. This is normal, and you know you can make alterations later.
When you choose a partner that suits you. Don’t expect it to be the perfect fit – suitability is not perfection. It’s more that you start with the best possible foundation (The dress you choose). And then when life inevitably goes through changes – BE a partner who is flexible to make adjustments (alterations) later.
4) I wanted something that felt mature and graceful, but yet innocent and youthful
While I was going through my shopping process, I struggled with dresses that either made me look too much like an old lady, or a little girl. I wanted something youthful and fun, while also making me feel like a mature woman.
I knew I wanted a similar feeling with a partner. Someone who I could be playful and stay youthful at heart with, while also being in a relationship that is growing in wisdom and strength.
5) I was open to what others’ opinions about it were, but ultimately I made the choice from my own heart
You know how it is, you bring family/friends along with you and they can sometimes sway your decisions about what YOU like and don’t like. The people working at the bridal shop can sometimes be extra pushy when their motivation is to make a sale.
Ultimately, you are the one wearing it and who will have memories in it. The decision is yours alone to make.
When you are going through the process of choosing a partner, others can either help or hinder you in making decisions. Almost 100% of the time, people are speaking through the lens of their own experience. While this is usually good intentioned, you have to take it into consideration.
After all opinions have been shared, I also imagined shutting them all off and listening to the inner voice.
6) I didn’t stop searching until I found the dress I didn’t want to take off…
When I finally found the dress… after three days of searching. There was one thing I noticed that stuck out from the rest that I had tried on.
I didn’t really want to take it off….
I wanted to keep admiring it in the mirror, and walking around with it on. The other ones I just couldn’t get off fast enough.
This might be self explanatory, but don’t give up on finding a partner until you find the one you TRULY don’t want to get rid of.
This post is inspired by:
Heartland Family Wellness Centre
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One response to ““The Right Fit”: 6 Ways Finding A Wedding Dress Is Just Like Finding Your Soulmate”
Sooo Good! You really nailed the Correlation between the two.